CK Love

Hello again, please take a look at mensunderwearstore.com, they are currently having 25% sales for most of their Calvin Klein underwear and loungewear. I, myself had just nabbed some as well as they do international shipping. Definitely much cheaper compared to buying them here on our shores! Happy shopping!

http://www.mensunderwearstore.com

iFame

Oh btw, I am the one on the left side!

So, sometime last year I was contacted via flickr, by the editor of a magazine called Nikonian's Beyond photography and they wanted to publish one of my photo on the book featuring Eye of Malaysia which i took during my holiday in Melaka. Of coz I was ecstatic, & its probably one of the first 100 photo I've shot with my first ever DSLR, and its nice to get some recognition on a magazine. Somehow this photobook is only available through online order and not in the newstand, so I doubt many has seen this spread. Its okay I got a one page spread of fame, I was contented enough and thanks ya to the magazine although I wasn't paid if you were curious to know!

Sony Wireless 7.1 surround Headset

Headset resting over Sony PS3 Soundbar.

I received my Sony stereo headset 7.1 surround today from Poslaju. This new headset is from Sony targeted to ps3 users as sony is boasting their ps3 exclusive 7.1 virtual surround only available to ps3 gaming. Anyway, since I'm a notorious apple junkie, I have to stress here that I'm also a huge Sony fan as well, having multiple Sony LCD and led at home, ps3, psp, Sony home theater system, Sony Dslr camera and also Sony ps3 soundbar for my room usage for gaming. So yes, I'm not all Apple-ly okay?

Back to the headset, it's design very futuristic, first glance I thought it's very metal gear solid 4 inspired design, matted black finishing and extremely minimal, cool kind of way! It's only available in one color so no pink or yellow people, who wears them anyway? Down side of the design is, when wearing the headset, it look a bit silly, I was referring it as the princess leia look! Bulky over both ears, with a flat top. Lol. I guess it's more of an ergonomic decision than aesthetics by the designer.

The Outside - packaging.

The inside.

Packaging is very simple and straight forward, don't expect Apple level kind of packaging. It's quite dissapointing actually, when u open the box then it's only the headphone wrap in a transparent plastic and a simple manual along with it's USB dongle. That's all nothing fancy about it. No pouch, no cable for charging, no stand for the headphone to rest on but then again Sony did not charge your rm500 for the headphone so deal with it. And iI feel it's actually very competitively priced in my opinion at rm300 each.

Futuristic design. Earpiece with soft comfortable pads.

After I opened the box up I quickly connect the USB into my MacBook air to test the sound and bass. I'm not an extremist when it comes to sound but I think it's fair to let you guys know my other speaker headphones so you know what to expect from these cans. At home I am using a pair of senheisser cx300 in-ear headphone which btw in my opinion able to pump out one of the best sound among others in-ear headphone I've testes, and I also listen to koss kc75. I am also currently using a pair of harman kardon soundstick III paired with my iMac and Sony home theater 5.1 connected to my ps3. I'll probably consider myself a moderate audiophile in terms of my expectations when it comes to sound quality.

Size comparison with a Macbook Air 11"

On my first run out of the box, I tested music from my iTunes library (using R&B settings on the equalizer), and was impressed by the sound, bass is adequate, vocals are crisp, and overall I enjoy listening to bassy music with these cans. Bass is there, but if you are a bass head, this cans will not impress you. Volume wise its pretty loud, its comfortable to use it around 80-90% of sound volume.

My previous encounter with large headset like this is they are usually very heavy and uncomfortable to the ears as they tend to drop and fall either forward or backward. You also have to consistency adjust the headset but I do not encounter this problem with this set, mainly because it's very light. The top part is made of thin metal, both sides plastic with adjustable volume and voice control for chatting. 7.1 surround on off is easily rechable on the top of left earpiece. The microphone can be retracted or pulled forward, the only thing is it feels a little fragile. So specially handle them with care. All indicator on the headset is done using a small led near the tip of the microphone which gives it an even more edgier feel!

Charging port.

I have to give prop to Sony, it's just plug and play, no hassle to download or install any software even on the Mac. According to Sony, it can last 7 hours after３hours of charging using micro Usb cable (same as the one you use to charge ur ps3 controllers).

All in all, it's a easy purchase that I'll recommend to anyone with a ps3, true that I havent spend ample of time testing on the sound and 7.1 surround sound, but if these and sounds good for my music, it'll definitely do better with gaming. Not to mention it's easy on the wallet as well, highly recommended!

p/s: all photos taken with Sony DSLR A550 + 50mm 1.4 lens

Confession of the broken heart

I am not happy these few days, PMS that is. Been busy with work, been sleeping a lot less, and I feel tired all the times. I have also been doing some thinking for now. And yes, I think I have problems dealing with my own feelings, and emotions. It is difficult to put in words how I feel but I'll try.  You see, I noticed that everytime if I ever feel that I am involving myself into a relationship more serious than just friendship, when I start to have feelings of more than just friends, I will take a step back. I think this thing happen at least 5 times now with different persons after my breakup last year. I don't know if it's because I was hurt so deeply before and now I do not want to expose myself again the same way, then subconsciously, I developed a self defense mechanism within me.  You can say that maybe I'd lost faith in relationship, I don't know. All I know is that I do not want to be hurt, do not want to feel pain again. Many times, I don't see myself loving anyone else new. It's not because I don't believe in love anymore, I still, but I have become cautious. Maybe too cautious, and maybe it will hurt me one day? And hurt many other sincere hearts around. I am sorry. I truly am, for those who cares.

My Gym Experience so far..

 Somewhere in the blog, I mentioned before that I am a late bloomer. Yes, just like many metrosexual guys out there, you know who you are! I care bout my appearance and what I am unhappy about myself is probably the fact that I had never had a 6-pecs before. I am not a person who likes outdoor, let alone sports. I'm more an indoor person so subscribing to gym has always been one of the thing I want to do before I hitting grave. Anyway, to cut the story short, I finally joined gym (yes, I think I hear cheers, and champagnes popping!)

Taeyang's HD 8-pecs

I read some men health magazine but frankly I like looking at pictures more than reading words, so I'll admit that I have zero knowledge when it comes to exercising and muscle building. This is another factor why I need help from personal trainers from gym to help me shape and build my body, yes I want to those HD 8 pecs goodness I saw on Corbin fisher! (repeat, high-def people)

Zac efron's nice beach body!

Besides doing strenuous weight lifting, my gym offered a variety of classes too including yoga, muay Thai, body combat, body work and pound down. So far I took muay Thai, body combat, bodywork and body pump. All of them gave me very different experiences, some I dig but some I don't. My top favorites are body combat and body work!

are you ready for Muay thai?

Firstly the body pump! Totally loved it!
What I love:
- sweats a hell lot of it
- music very upbeat ( luv them!)
- workout for most of the major muscles by using weights
- The most intense has to be the abs workout! which I failed to finish
- feeling extremely satisfied and happy at the end of class
They instructor say I have to come for his next class, I think he saw that I really enjoyed myself lol!

Body combat
-Very excited to join the class!
-Music are very upbeat, basically you do a lots of punches, kicking, then punches again, imagine non-stop for an hour in a fast pace
-I feel I'm not made up for such high intensity workout yet, but I'm going catch up!
-I feel more tired as compared to body work and muscle aching as well! Which is good!
-Will definitely come again, good and enjoyable cardio!

Muay Thai:
The starting part of warming up and later part of warming down is extremely challenging if you do it properly. I'm not really interested in the whole muay Thai thing, it's difficult cause you need to learn the stance, punch and block. I only sweat a little. And for this class you'll need one partner, training consist of you doing blocking, he doing the attack and vice versa. Unfortunately my partner was a sadist. He really attacked me it was so painful! Coz he's bigger size as in fatness, when I attacked him back, I felt pain again! Grrr! So no I never really liked it! Pain! pain! pain!

Pound down
ER.. For the first 5 mins I knew I joined the wrong class already. It's basically for girls or men who like to shake their Bon Bon. The music was excellent though. We warmed up with tae yang's I need a girl! Love the song! When can my body become like taeyang's? The routine was really boring for me, I at least yawned 20 times in that hour alone. Didn't sweat much, only stretching the muscles. Many routines involve vigorous shaking of hip and my hip was really stiff! They also require you to do many poses, most which is also frequently seen in pornos. Leg wide opened, and then lift up to the sky, hip thrusting movements, bending forward on your knees to do doggie styles etc. Err absolutely not my cup of tea!

CIN2 Love

So I ordered 4 pairs of cin2u undies from the states, it's from the kinetic and pop series. The kinetic series has simpler designs and the pop series come with a multitude of colors and choices, definitely for those who are not into boring monotonous underwear colors. 

Pop color is made of 100% cotton.

Kinetic series made of 97% cotton 3% elasthane.

Made in Malaysia. LOL!

 They are packaged individually in slipcases. And as you can tell they both look great, feels extremely soft, comfortable and hip!

Cin2 has proprietary bulge enhancing slips technology in the under wears so if you're really keen on these you'll have to fork out some extra dollars for em.

Slip enhancer

These underwear are still on sales on the official webpage so get them while it last.  Just an additional information, cin2 only charge a flat rate of usd8 for international shipping.

http://www.cin2u.com

And just a side note, Aussiebum is still having sales till the 26/9/2011, head on over to browse their collections, free international shipping ya!

http://www.aussiebum.com

D'Jokja Love

I LOVE JOKJA

Last May, I made a trip to Jogjakarta, Indonesia, for a short holiday. This is the second most important tourism spot in Indonesia after Bali. I was the one who chose to go there after seeing many beautiful pictures of this Javanese island, and I went there with a group of close friends and family.

We flew with AirAsia

We manage to book a local tour and a private bus to take us around and this place is gorgeous!!! This place was once conquered before by Buddhism and Hinduism and so many of its building and temples had their influences. Among the famous things youll find here includes batik, silver works, traditional leather puppetry and gamelan music. Among the places not to be missed includes the famous mt. Merapi, Borobudur temple, and Prambanan temple. Food wise, I really enjoyed them. They are mostly mixed of sweet and spicy, just like malaysian food, most restaurant will serve with delicious sambals and chillies! Ah! Can't Live without them. And enjoy these photos I took during my trips there.

Majestic Prambanan temple

At Prabanam temple

Stone carving @ Borubudor

Resting Buddha, Borobudur temple

Top of Borobudur

Batik Printing

Sunset beach view

At the "market" where they sell virtually any type of live pet animal.

Mt. Merapi from Airplane view.

Underwarez

Aussielicious swimwear

I am having a condition called underwearism. The people affected by this disease display symptoms such as spending hours browsing at underwear sections of department stores finding for the exact color and pattern of undies, they do not mind paying for branded underwears which often cost more than the price of their haircuts or have their underwear shipped from overseas because their god damn country does not sell them! On an average day, they will spend more time choosing the underwear than their top they're wearing, even no ones going to sees it. And If they ever decide to wear a low waist pants or a tiny body hug tee, they will choose underwears with very striking and notable waist bands, hoping that someone will be caring enough to catch a glimpse of their proud collections. This group of people has a collection of underwears enough to last for at least two months without recycling any pair. Some of them may follow major underwear brands on their twitter list or facebook accounts and worship them as god. On the worst spectrum, they may display rage when their favorite piece of underwear got unremovable stains, got chewed by neighbors dog or the undies got holes from wear and tear.

CIN2 ad.

I will admit that I have all these symptoms and more. My collections are at least 50-60 pairs strong and growing, more than 1/3rd still in their mint box unopened. If I ever travel overseas, I'll try my best to get those brands not available locally. My favorites has to be from Aussiebums, Private Atructures, Calvin Klein, CIN2 and skin wears. Others found in my collections include John Henry, jockeys and some Renomas. Usually, I'll go for the more bright colors, low waist briefs with striking waistbands and I like those made of cotton, microfiber and modal - extremely soft and comfortable. And swimwear hands down, only aussiebums. I always have found simple white brief too be the most attractive.

Calvin Klein ad.

My least favourite would be boxers! absolutely hate em! I also dislike g-string or thongs as well as fishnets.. urgh! Fishnets are so uncomfortable unless you have ur stuff all shaved and shiny. But its all up to your personal preferences.

Private structures - Malaysian brand

What about you? what are your favourist and least favourite.

eXerciseBOX

2AM for Mens Health

So in my quest to becoming the next abs model in mens healths magazine (I wish), err, farcry? well sometimes people need dream yo! Gimme a break. Okay, call me vain now and I will admit it, but sometime a year ago I don't really care if I'm fat or if I have a tummy, was going to go with the excuse of having fat genes (yes! My grandpa was in the local newspaper back then being one of the fattest guy around). And of course I started rethinking about my life and how I should start losing weight and live healthier in terms of lifestyle and be more active physically. Also, I want to look more sexy and determine to abandon my twinky look (yes I still consider myself a twink at 27 of age, lol).

Your shape fitness evolved.

So I got myself an xbox slim and kinect last Christmas as an excuse to do exercise, with ubisoft fitness game called, yourshape fitness evolved. It's a very comprehensive game as it has multiple program selection, some for weight lost, some for body toning, and then they track your progress online to be compared to your friends and families. Then it was updated with more fitness Options, yoga classes, bollywood dances, boxing classes, and cardio classes.

A typical screenshot from the game, the person on the right is a miror image of yourself.

TV ad for Yourshape fitness evolved!.

The game tracks how much calories was burn, and the information on screen tells you if you are in sync with the instructor. A typical timer on the top, and exercise information on the top right. You are presented with a virtual version of yourself (how cool is that), and every movements is mirrored on screen so you can do comparison with the instructor on the left, very useful! The graphics here are very well done, interface is very intuitive and modern ala in minority report, cool x10!

Ea Active sport come in a box bundled with resistant band, and heart rate sensor!

Graphics are more cartoony and colorful as compared to ubisoft's your shape.

Trailer shown in E3 demonstrating the game modes.

The second fitness game I got was ea active sports 2. This game is very cool, it comes with a heart rate sensor that you wear over your arms and as you do exercise your heart rate will be displayed on screen! How cool! This game also has online component, and the exercises concentrates on different body part you wish to target, extremely customizable! Kinect is really meant for exercise games. The instructor will constantly give you feedback saying your too slow, you have to jump higher, your arms not straight enough, every angles matters! Highly recommended game as well and it comes with a resistant band for more effective workout and for those who are more serious you can add weights (buy from furthers shop) over your wrist and feet so you'll burn more calories.

Harmonix crafted a masterpiece, yet again!

The 3rd games is not really a fitness game but it is the game I had most fun with! It's called dance central only available exclusively for kinect made by the genius behind rockband series, Harmonix! This is probably the best kinect game ever, essentially a dancing game with great song list, updated monthly and downloadable through xboxlive but with a fee. It's also a great party game and it's such a blast to have danceoff in your living room with friends and family. It's does has a workout mode, although not too comprehensive, basically just cardio workout. By just playing game itself, you'll not only guaranted to sweat profusely, your muscle will ache as well!

Ellen degeneres introducing dance central!

So, who said games are for lazy, fat bum? Think twice!

The love story Part I

Each person has a story to tell, it could be a story of a successful business venture or a great career, a story of an unforgettable adventure, or a story about a magical life event of famous person. I'm not a famous person, and this is not a story about business or career, it's hardly an adventure, but this is my story, the story about love and its definitely unforgettable, most magicable 6 years of my life. It is a good story? Now, that is debatable. Those who always see life as half full, for these people, it doesn't really matter if the story has an unhappy ending, at least the sweet memories were there, although they don't last, at least they happened. Others felt that stories with bad endings are bad stories. This is my story, and this is how it all started.

Seven years ago, I was just a 20 years old student, I major in all the sciences and mathematics back in my college days. The truth was, I never really liked them. Since young, my passion was primarily on drawing and art. I'm always good with pencils, and I went to attend drawing lessons at very young of age. My father would encourage me to join many art related competitions, those were my glory days, where I was happy doing what I love most. I really missed those times. I wanted to be an artist who draws and paint beautiful pictures, I wanted to open a gallery of my own, and all I ever wanted was to show the world my art. But dreams are called dreams for a reason, they are not real, sadly, not in my case. My parents wants me to pursue medicine. I still remember how they would make me talk to family doctors about pursuing the career as medical promised good and easy life with good job prospect. At that time my sister was already in India as a first year medical student. My sister would call and talk to me about how great were the courses, the place, food, how beautiful the campus, and at that time I was really scared. I was scared to lose my dream, to pursue something that I was not familiar with. But in the other hand, I dare not make a firm stand on my choice, so I chose the easier way out. I went to become mommy's good boy and agreed to go to medical school to pursue my parent's dream. No, they were not my dream.

I enrolled in a medical school in a small town in southern state of India. This place is very secluded, far from civilization. You need to board a plane from Kuala Lumpur to Bangalore (often called as the silicon valley of India), from there, you will need to transit to a smaller place called Mangalore, you then take a two hours taxi ride to a small place called Manipal. I've heard horror stories of India, told by aunties and uncles who dare not even set foot there themselves. They too, listen to stories  told by another person whom I suspect, got the stories from another person.. yada yada.. You get the idea, those stories were basically false stories and most of the part does not paint the real picture of India. I went there with full mental preparation of the worst case scenarioes, no electricity -check, smelly environments -check, unhygienic food -check, poor water supply, you know the drills. I've basically psyched myself up, I said "bring it on", I am ready for the next 5 years of hell. Little did I know, god has planned a little surprise for me.

I still remembered vividly my feelings the first night I set foot on India, I was scared and lonely. This mark the first time I left home, to a foreign place, far far away from my parents. I went to my hostel, the room was huge, it has a small kitchen and boy even the bathroom was big as well, it was a pleasant surprise! I told myself, maybe India is not as bad as how they potrayed them to be. I couldn't sleep well the first night, I missed my bed, I missed the smell of my room, I missed my brothers who I shared bed with since young. I have no friends with me, heck I haven't meet with any of my classmates yet. It was definitely mixed feelings for me, I was unsure what this new place has in store for me, I was sad about leaving my comfort zone, at the same time, I felt a tinge excitement in me.

Early the next morning, my sister brought me to the nearest most indian kind of place for breakfast. Enjoying your roti paratha (canai, they called it here in Malaysia) with ur tables set right under a tree in a small open space area, with bollywood indian hit songs playing in a low quality radio mono sound in the background. The place was packed, it seems like a hotspot for breakfast, I thought to myself. As we were eating, my sister noticed three boys walking past our tables to the next table. She instantly noted to me that those guys were my new classmates. Well, the place is small, everyone knew everyone. She pushed me to go and have a little chat with my them, making friends with them as she's leaving for classes soon and I better be having my own gang, rather than having her babysit me most the time. Yes I was rather dependent on my big sister, why wounldn't I? It's partly her that I'm halfway around the world away from home. I was rather a shy and timid person back then, especially to unfamiliar new faces. Gulp!

As I walked up to them, I noticed a very japanese looking young boyish face. This guy was stylo, his hair was dyed light brow, his eyebrows were thick, his eyes were dark brown, he has good complexion, he was about my size and height, was fit, and he has the most handsome smile ever. He's exactly the type of guy that anyone would notice walking by. I walked up to them, acting like I'm not distracted by the good looking guy on the same table. I forced a friendly smile in my awkward face, I said hi and introduced myself to them, at that time, I did not realize that this is the group of friends who I'm gonna spend most of my time in India with. Let's call mr. handsome face mr. Z. Naturally, I was extremely shy with Mr. Z. Yes I talked to him but dare not look directly into his eyes. We hangout, most of the time for the next one year but mostly in groups, so I hardly had private moments with Z alone. Mr. Z was a great friend of mine, he's probably the nicest person ever. I always made comparison of him with dinosaurs and how his species of men has reached extinction and he would just laugh out loud about it. He was a person with little opinions, he is well mannered, a true gentlemen -he would say yes to my suggestions, will  not reject any form of requests and definitely will not say no to helping a friend in need. He mixes well with many people, he's always the good guy, never the bad guy. He do not gossips about friends, and he has no enemy.

I got very close to Mr. Z during our first year final exam study period. At that time I already moved out of hostel to a small apartment unit where Mr. Z stayed next door with his friend. Either he came over to my unit, or I went to his unit, it was a routine, we both spent good times together, studying at most part. Of course, secretly I was already falling for him. But I dare not whisper or act it out in front of him, I just played cool at most part. Why would I act stupid and tell him how I feel and then have our friendship completely ruined?  I dare not cross my border to jeopardize the relationship that we are building. We spent almost a month together,  just me and him, til the day of exam. We were studying mostly, sometimes we would just relax and talk bout all the silly things we did in schools, all the people we met, all the things we enjoyed doing. We had breakfast, dinner and lunch together. It was definitely intimate and my feelings grew much stronger for him than ever before. So, after exams were over, we both decides to join the after-exam celebrations. It's a ritual our classmates had each time after writing our last paper. Everyone will gather in the local club and drank our heart out, dances to musics, it was both fun and silly. Frankly, Z and me, we both were and still are lousy drinkers. I would lose all my inhibitions and just talk silly after sips of beer (and I am not exaggerating, this has been proven over and over again!). We hangout there for awhile, most of my friends were already drunk and Mr. Z was halfway there. I secretly took his alcohol away, and then poured them into my own glass, so that I would help him drink. My way of reducing his alcohol intake. Then, I insisted to go back home as it was already late at night. Z agreed.

We took the tok-tok, it was the local form of public transportation around the small campus towm. It is basically a three wheeled transport with a driver in front and it only sits three person max, two person if both passenger are obese. The night was cold, Mr. Z sat closely besides me, he was already talking nonsense, usually he's more of a quiet type of guy. He then rested his head over my right shoulder. He lifted his head, then whispered in my ears. He told me that I am the closest person to him with a soft gentle voice. He layed his head over my shoulder for the next 30 mins till we reached home. It was definitely an awkward moment for me, I wasn't drunk, and my I made sure I did not move a muscle over my shoulder, I want to enjoy the moment. As we were reaching home, we went straight up to my unit, to my bedroom. We both sat down on the floor,  I leaned against the wall behind my back. We chatted for awhile, still mr. Z remains talkative, we went on chatting and laughing, we had great fun, enjoyed the company of each other. This was the moment when the magic happened. He moved closer to me, and stared directly into my eyes. Then the most unexpected word came out of his mouth. He asked me with a gentle voice "can I kiss you?". I was really stunned, I felt palpitation, my mind went blank. He's only a few inches away from kissing me. I paused for a moment, I held my breath for a second and then I whispered back yes. Then I went for it. We lip locked for a brief moment. It was my first kiss, and it was amazing... There were like firework just like the one in moulin rouge's kissing scene. It was beautiful! Nothing could be more perfect than that!

Enjoy, the elephant love medley, scene from one of my favourite movie!

the phone call..

I am waiting for someone's call.. I am restless, I can't sleep, I can't enjoy myself, I can't appreciate my last day at home. I am patiently waiting for a phone call, a call that was never meant to happen. This was someone whom I thought was rather important to me for a little while, but reality does have a way to sting you where you're at your most vulnerable self. Story is like this, I've meet with someone from the cyberspace, someone I never knew, and never will know. He remains mysterious to me for most of the time when we're messaging and chatting, or skyping. Yes, I am going to admit here that I'm lonely and I do enjoy company from strangers from time to time. I am someone who has practically everything I ever wanted. I have a great job, I have everything I need and also bought many things that I dont need, I have a wonderful family, I have few but really good friends.. but life has never been enough for a person like me. I am never truly happy!

So, lets just name this person Mr. J. He's young, happy go lucky guy, high spirited, smart, all confident kind of guy, charming, greatlooking (as what I've heard), one word = the perfect man. We spent considerable amount of time on talking, sharing experiences, advising each other, sometimes teasing and fooling around with each other. But Mr. J is not perfect, he has this medical condition, which sometimes put him great discomfort, and haven't I mentioned so far, being a "caring" doctor,  thats what I've been told, I would gave him advises, shares his pains with him even offered to take care of him (in the event, if he ever needs me), there is only so much I can do for him. Our "friendship" lasted for maybe 2 months? I would go to work till 12 midnights and then came back tired in front of the computer staring at a nickname, and then talk for 1-2 hours and then go to bed in the middle of morning. Each passing days, my connection I felt was growing, and its not something withing my control.

Fast forward a little to the ending was, Mr. J. had made it very clear that this 'friendship' should not even happen, and is wrong since the beginning, I quickly held back, suppressed my feelings, and stop getting involved with him. I sent a rather long winded message, saying how by continuing this will only left me hurt, and mind you, I'm still not recuperating from my broken heart. So we then stopped doing what we been doing. I ended it. Like what Mr. J has confessed, his biggest weakness was suprising not the medical condition that he's been suffering. His weakness lies in the inability of himself 'managing' human - in his own word. Throughout his life, he confessed of often unintentionally misguiding and misleading people into self-made feelings or in my own words 'deluded make believe relationship'. Like the one that I had with him. Often leaving the 'victims' heartbroken, and emotionally damaged.. okay maybe damage is a harsh word!

But to Mr. J's defense, he did changed my life, most of it to the better. I started buying books and I enjoy reading them, I started taking good care of what I eat, I started to have a routine to do exercises, and to build my body (Mr. J has a perfect 6 pacs). Basically I gain the determination of heal and improve myself! (It does sound like Mr. J is more of a doctor than myself!)
I'm slowly accepting the fact that, sometimes, some people just walked n crosses in your life, and then leave and change you (for better or worst), and they had to leave. Ironicaly, until today I dont know how Mr. J looked like, all I remember was his name, his voice, and his words.

So why am i waiting for the call? why do feel the way I'm feeling now. Maybe I just want to know that he's fine. He has been going through some rough patch in life I wish that I am there for him the same way that he was there for me. All I wanted to say this to him is this, "dear Mr. J, I'll forever support you in whatever you do, for better, for worse. And I wish you all the love and luck, my dear friend!"

Im packing to leave. Leave this place of sadness.

Oh yes, music of the moment..

Old friend..

I guess everyone has a song for the right moment, and this is my song.. this is my story..

2 nights ago, I met him again, this time, he's different. Much different than who I remembered he was. I return home for a short holiday. We've talked on the phone and I've made it clear than I wanted to see him again. This meeting is important for me, I've not see him in one year. Twelve months of seperation- after our break up. One year, everyone changed,  I'm too have changed, a foreign person even to myself.

He called me, we made arrangement to meet in Melacca. Melacca is a special place to me, this is where I've spend more than two years of my life, sharing every moments of sweetness and love with him, the most special person in my life, my true love. As ironic as it sound, I am not only meeting him, but I am also going to meet his girl for the first time. This is not a one-to-one meeting, this is a 5 person date. Me with two of my friend, him with his significant others.

We met at a KTV in Melacca. I am not going to lie, my heart was beating really fast, my hands were shaking, I was nervous, I went to the bathroom a few times, I want to make sure I looked good, my hair was in place, my shirt was not messy, I want him to see the new, the better me. And then he knocked on our door, he has arrived. I opened the door and shook hands with the girl, and then to him. He smiled at me, he was glad to see me. It was awkward, I forced a smile on my face, I had too, the girl has no idea of our past, she can never know!

You might be wondering, why meet him now? why meet him with his girl? You are going to be heart broken again. The truth is, he couldnt have hurt me more than what he already did, and yes, who am I to fool, I would be lying to myself if I say I wasn't sad, because I was. In fact I was sad all the time for a year, for twelves days, each day for 365 days. He sat down right next to me. He looked rugged, aged a little over 12 months, but his smile, more handsome than before, it reminds me how that smile had stolen my heart 7 years ago..

I wish I could hold his hands, but I couldn't. I wish I could hug him, to let him know I am okay. I am doing okay without him. And they say, sweet memories are the ones that is going to last forever.

And nevermind.... I'll find.. someone like you.... I wish nothing but the best for you..
don't forget me, I begged, i'll remember you said, somethings it last in love but sometimes it hurt instead..

Enjoy the song..

"Someone Like You by Adele"

I heard
That you're settled down
That you
Found a girl
And you're
Married now

I heard
That your dreams came true.
Guess she gave you things
I didn't give to you

Old friend
Why are you so shy?
Ain't like you to hold back
Or hide from the light

I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited
But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it.
I had hoped you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded
That for me it isn't over

Never mind
I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you too
Don't forget me, I begged
I remember, you said
Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead.
Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead,
Yeah.

You know how the time flies
Only yesterday
It was the time of our lives
We were born and raised
In a summer haze
Bound by the surprise
Of our glory days

I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited
But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it.
I had hoped you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded
That for me it isn't over.

Never mind
I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you too
Don't forget me, I begged
I remember, you said
Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead.

Nothing compares
No worries or cares
Regrets and mistakes
They are memories made.
Who would have known
How bittersweet this would taste?

Never mind
I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you
Don't forget me, I begged
I remember, you said
Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead

Never mind
I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you too
Don't forget me, I begged
I remember, you said
Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead

Sometimes it lasts in love
But sometimes it hurts instead